Profile Tips help you put your strengths profile to work
“I don’t want to disappoint the Carringtons,” said Sharon, studying the invitation. “Their Christmas party is on Friday night at 8. We can stop in after the kids’ school program.”
Brian paused as he looked up from his laptop. Sharon’s enthusiasm brought sparkle to his life.
Yet lately he had noticed dark smudges underneath her eyes. She looked stressed. Brian’s energetic, outgoing wife was busy on the phone making arrangements for volunteers at church … shopping … organizing the year-end celebration at her office …
“What do you think, Brian?” Sharon asked.
Here’s a Tip
Use your strengths to keep balance during the holidays.
Sharon’s caring spirit was one of her strengths and led her to serve many others – not just Brian, but other family members and friends, too. Yet Brian knew that his wife had a hard time setting priorities and often overscheduled herself and their family. Sharon’s approach was, “I don’t want to miss anything!”
Meanwhile, “I don’t want to go!” had been Brian’s regular mantra early in their marriage. More than once, Brian had made the mistake of routinely quashing his wife’s enthusiasm. The standoff had led to isolation between them.
But over the years, Brian and Sharon had come to realize that when it came to busy-ness, their differences balanced one another. Slowly, as Brian began to share more activities with Sharon, he discovered he enjoyed them – and being with her. And on occasions when he asked her to slow down, she admitted that she liked having time to recuperate her energy quietly with her husband.
In fact, Brian and Sharon had come to the place where they trusted each other’s strengths and looked for each other’s signals to help them stay in balance.
To Brian, the Carrington party question was one of those signals. And he had a choice.
Brian could say “Yes, let’s go to the party,” even though his wife and their children needed a breather in the family’s holiday schedule. He could say “No way!” and create a barrier with Sharon. Or he could affirm her strengths as they made the decision together.
“I’d like to spend time with the Carringtons, too,” Brian said. “But remember how crowded it was at their party last year? Let’s get more one-on-one with them instead. Can we a look for a date in January to have them over for dinner?”
Sharon smiled. She and Brian had found a way to use their strengths to complement one another during life’s busy seasons, rather pull each other off balance.
How do your strengths balance your family members’ strengths? Use them. Together.